Sorry, monkey. Fall Out Boy's Pete Wentz has a new romance with Ashlee Simpson. BRYAN BEDDER/GETTY IMAGES

Kevin Federline may have to give up a large portion of his bling in the divorce. BRYAN BEDDER/GETTY IMAGES

Britney gets Fed-up; Kayne late in registering his loss; coming out, Doogie style; and Ashlee's nose isn't her only sham

Date published: 11/9/2006

Fed-exed (finally!)

Wow. I always knew this day would come, but I'm still shaken to the core. Britney Spears and Kevin Federline are actually filing for divorce. It seems that Britney has shed not only her baby weight but her dead weight as well, by kicking K-Fed to the curb.

The divorce papers cite "irreconcilable differences" and Britney has applied for custody of the couple's two children. I can only imagine what pushed her to pull the plug, but I picture Britney going into labor a second time while her husband/houseboy is propped in the corner on his Game Boy, talking on his Bluetooth.

Or perhaps it's the never-ending string of trips to Vegas or his embarrassing "music" career that won't seem to die.

Regardless of her reasons for becoming a double divorcee, it's great that she can now go back to being our nation's resident tart. Christina Aguilera isn't nearly as entertaining. Let's just hope Britney heeded our warnings for a strict and severe prenup.

It was all sour grapes for Kanye West at last week's MTV Europe Music Awards. The arrogant rapper was none too pleased that he didn't win the coveted Best Video award, and stormed the stage in front of the live audience to air his grievances.

It took several awkward moments for the crowd to realize that this wasn't a sketch, that this was an actual meltdown by a well-known celebrity. As the winners, Justice and Simian, were accepting the award for their video "We Are Your Friends," Kanye made his way onto the stage to give his own speech, which went something like this:

"Best Video should have been mine. I should have won," West said in reference to his video for "Touch the Sky," arguing that it "cost a million dollars; Pamela Anderson was in it. I was jumping across canyons."

From now on, I think Kanye should lose out on every major award, just so we can capture more precious moments like this on film.

Following in the footsteps of Lance Bass , Neil Patrick Harris , aka Doogie Howser, M.D., admits to being an out-and-proud gay man.

His confession comes after a Web site claimed that Neil used his pull to get his boyfriend a role on his sitcom.

This news just makes his role in "Harold and Kumar Go to Whitecastle" seem that much more compelling. I just wish other rumored gay men would take a twirl outside of the closet.

Ah, young love blossoms between Ashlee Simpson and Fall Out Boy frontman Pete Wentz .

It's always entertaining when pseudo "rock stars" get together and make one gorgeously pretentious couple.

According to MSN.com, Ashlee and Pete were spotted getting awfully cozy with each other recently in LA. No one knows the true status of the couple, but I'm sure Pete will do whatever it takes to keep FOB on the radar for a few more months. I haven't been this confused about a couple since Hilary Duff and Good Charlotte's Joel Madden started dating. I still can't figure that one out! Why?!

--Compiled from gossip sources

BASSEY ETIM-EDET is a student at George Mason University.

Date published: 11/9/2006